I'm about 16 1/2 weeks along in my third pregnancy. Yesterday I witnessed the miracle of what many call "the quickening" or when a mother feels the first kicks of her baby in the womb. This is my third child, but the miracle of this moment never ceases to take my breath away. I think this moment especially blessed me due to the various circumstances transpiring that day and throughout my pregnancy.
Since getting pregnant with this little precious one, I've battled a fear of miscarriage. Several close friends tragically lost their little ones just before or just after I learned of my pregnancy and my grief for them transferred into fear (and guilt) over my own pregnancy. I mourned with them, but I realized (with the help of my husband, friends, and the grace of God) that I should put my hope in the Lord and not to give up on my own baby. Since then I have spoken God's word of Truth over this pregnancy - that God's plan for us is for good, and not harm, that my hope is in the Lord, and that His ways are higher than mine.
We've also been experiencing a battle of health insurance. Without going into all the details, our insurance was dropped at the end of February, just after my first appointment and the hearing of the heartbeat. I've refrained from going to my monthly appointments because I didn't want to get billed until our insurance was stable again. We had received the worst of the news (the denial of health coverage for the family) yesterday morning. Yesterday evening God blessed me with the first kicks of my little one. As I sat there holding my little belly I thought about my God. He is the one who knits this child together, He is the one who holds his or her future, and He controls not only the time when he or she will come into the world, but also how it will be paid for. I am overwhelmed with joy thinking about the life inside me. Doubts and fears may swirl about us, but the Lord is our Rock. And our child is in the most loving hands imaginable.
Today we received good news on our insurance, so don't worry about us. :)